After the years they have put into raising you, and any of your siblings, it's likely that you can say they did their best; through the good times, and the stressful as well. Truthfully who knows them as well as they know you? Of course you appreciate all the times, and might now be having difficulty with decisions related to helping them as they age. Many are quick to consider nursing homes, and services, though like many others, you may be feeling that is too cold and impersonal. You know the odds are you will care more than even the best of those in the field of elderly care.
On the other hand though, you may have your own children at home now, and your own full schedule. Now you know some of what your parents went through when raising you. No doubts you don't want to just throw them off on others care.Whatever you choose, you want to think it from your parent(s) eyes. There are at least 3 important areas to consider that your parent(s) may go through in all of this. It may help you better deciding what to do either way:
1) Your parent(s) activities – They have been spent years doing things that keep them busy, and happy. The best decisions as to how to take care of them will allow them what they have always done (even if assisted). If at all possible, don't leave them in a situation where nothing is the same anymore.
2) Their household roles – Over the years, they have had responsibilities at home. These chores to many might seem trouble, though often they are usual activities that remind them they can do it. Leaving them on the couch in front of the TV, doing their roles from past may simply bring them to resenting you, or simply lost without things they are used to to do.
3) Their social activities – After children grow up, often parents become even more outgoing. One thing they eventually run into is depression as those they socialize with begin showing up in the obituaries at seemingly an alarming rate. With this comes less places they can visit, or call. Often as they go along time in this area, they settle for less, though it bothers them more than most know. Especially when only one of your parents remains as in addition to the friends, often their most important relationship is lost to them.
Another strong area though in deciding is the question, "How capable are they of doing things in general?" Many can continue doing most if not all of what their life has been for a long time with some help. A combination of family effort, part time elderly care in the home, and community resources can enable this, and allow your parent(s) to be as happy as possible.
On the other hand, there are those that aren't as capable of doing regular things as a result of health problems and other things that can come with age. Some definitely need 24 hour care, and few can do that themselves. It's best to look at everything, and if this is the case, Elderly Care in a nursing home may actually be the best.
The focus of this article is based on some experience in family elderly care, watching for an extended period of time how it progresses. Making decisions on this level can bring stresses to all involved, however you really do want to put thought into it. With good thought though, you can find the best possible balance and decisions.
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